The Flirt

I look at her leaning against the bar, she is a natural flirt. Men gravitate towards her, soaking in her warm energy, laughing at her little jokes and peeves. I wonder to myself what is so different between her and me (apart from her size 0 waist and perky tits, which of course doesn’t hurt in the world of flirting). My tits aren’t so perky. They are ample enough to be sexy if I wore a low top and push up bra but considering my (quite good) personal style shows as much skin as a nun during Lent, my ample breasts look sexy like your aunties homely old living room cushions (soft, squishy and comfortable). So there’s that, then there’s the awkwardness of it all. To have a good flirting game you must first admit to yourself that that good looking person would also find you a good looking person. After this highly un-British rather extravagant display of self assurance you must then consider the boundaries. Eg. flirt enough to make the person find you charming but not enough to make it awkward, you don’t want them to believe you are truly interested otherwise a whole complex and embarrassing mess will (and does generally) follow. Another part to the conundrum is this; you wish your ideas to be taken seriously, but in this man/woman flirt situation it is highly rare that when you’ve laid your cards on the table the man will jump up and shout; that’s it she’s got it! She’s a genius. What a brilliant idea. Certainly not, because as a flirting woman you are empowered but not the one in the dynamic with the power, besides, your brilliant idea is still being overlooked because he’s still thinking about sex. So you can either flirt with a man and get a little lustful attention or just go about your business pretending to be like a man so that your very brilliant self is almost fully recognised. Being a woman is complex business indeed, thank god there are a few men left in the world that find sexless shy girls with cushion tits still attractive. (I’m not talking to you, Bob).


The fatal flower is the perverted shy girl, the one you wouldn’t suspect. Under a soft exterior lies a complex being with an unyielding wildness, anchored to the earth by her humble nature and inexplicable dry humour. She is the femme of now, the modern woman who’s thoughts transcend through cultures and time.

Over the coming months let ‘La Fleur Fatale’ be your guide to the hidden insights and stories of a watchful woman’s eye navigating through the ‘European’ way of life. Struggles and mishaps ensue as life is embraced and the thorny introvert femme clammers for life’s answers. All possible subjects are covered from death to Kim Kardashian and from sisterhood to the perfect strawberry frappe.

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